Sometimes you get to a point in life. A time to pivot. Perhaps stop and reflect, ask yourself the tough questions, reassess- but then ultimately pivot. It hurts and it’s hard to do but sometimes there’s a knowing that you will be better for it. 

I want you to forgive yourself. I want you to understand that it’s not you- it’s them. The ones who don’t get you or your high sensitivity when you thought they did. 

The ones who just don’t listen let alone hear what you have to say. 

The ones who follow the crowd on the well worn path that never diverts. 

It’s not you. It’s them.

You need to keep being YOU. Because that’s where your heart is happiest. That’s where it beats the loudest to the sound of your soul. 

YOU are enough. Yes, you are enough and you are too much for some. That’s OK. Not everyone will sense what you sense or even try to and not everyone will meet you at your feelings. And that’s where they need to be to count.

They will judge and decipher rightly or falsely. It’s out of your hands.

They will openly offer advice, project their own experience on you or tell you to ‘not let it worry you’. You’d sometimes LIKE to be able to think ‘whatever’ or tell someone to f*&ck off. It’d be easy then wouldn’t it? But you’re just not like that. And you never will be. 

And YOU ARE ENOUGH. Be real. Be authentic. 

You’re a feeler, a deep thinker, a student of contemplation, a dreamer, a hoper and a light to the few who really know you. 

Sure. Sometimes you overthink, you lose perspective because of the fact, you overreact or it blows up in your face. And you feel it all. ALL. OF. IT.

But now is that TIME TO PIVOT! Not to change who you are or who you HAVE been. Those things are given. But to change how you TREAT yourself for it. FORGIVE YOURSELF. You deserve that much. 

It’s time to pick yourself up, dust yourself off from that well worn and bloody boring path and quietly walk your own way, with your own hopes, your own goals. Be confident in being all of YOURSELF. Feel comfortable to find your own stride. Your own direction. Be proud of what you’ve been through. What you’ve suffered either silently or with forceful voice. Be proud of the children you’ve created. They are your legacy and the world is lucky to have them. Show them how to be strong and emotional and full of feeling. Show them how to stand tall and proud. 

It’s time to look after YOU. You’re sorry you were absent and you’re sorry you got distracted and busy and hum ho. You’ve self criticised and cut your own tall poppy self down enough now. 

It’s time to pivot and drive your own damn train!! ALL ABOARD!!

 

E x

PS- If you need this ‘note to self’ feel free to use it. I suggest something larger than a post it note.

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