Hello my name is Eliza and I’m so happy to say (I don’t think I’m ) a digital addict any more!
It’s been nearly two months now and I haven’t been on Facebook or Instagram (only to post my blogs). I’ve been to no meetings and I don’t have a sponsor to sit beside me.
I won’t say ‘”I’m cured” because in the back of my mind, I don’t think I could return ‘just a little bit’ to the gram and BookFace right now. I think it’d still possible suck me in to the void of zombie like behaviour like much of society is becoming.
So what DO I have?
I have good relationships!!!
Since I’ve forgone the digital addiction, time has allowed me to genuinely develop relationships that count with those close to me. Rather than commenting or emojifying (what?!) their latest snap of life, whether a meal, their latest purchase or their cute cat, I have learnt the same information through conversing!
You know? Like ‘talking’?
Generally over coffee, face to face and without alien-like pods sticking out of my ears.
Along with verbal communication comes feeling.
I sense feeling the excitement or pleasure from others when they describe their latest hike/ achievement/ day in pyjamas and likewise- I can feel their disappointment or lament when the meal they had had a cockroach in it (true)/ their purchase didn’t make them any happier on the inside, or their cute cat killed a budgie and ate it in front of them.
I go around to each of my family members to ask how their day went (after actioning ‘take those things out of your ears’ like a mime loser).
Sometimes I get a great conversation and can be a supportive and excellent listener, other times I get the eye roll, a grunt and not much else. But that’s life and at least the reactions are real, felt and thought about.
My time is invested in ‘being there’ for the family. We’ve even sat together watching old video (visual footage around before SnapChat and You Tube).
This then derives in memories resurfacing and stories being retold. Also and again- the occasional eye roll and grunt. You can’t relay or appreciate all this through emojis and likes. You live it and you feel it.
My family is my pillar of strength and my greatest achievement . I love you all.
My friendship base in the last two months has tapered out- SUBSTANTIALLY.
Only those with values that match mine have stayed in contact with me. And I think that’s how it should be right? Certainly a great way to ‘find your tribe’ as they all say on the streets these days.
Why spend precious time on those who don’t REALLY give a damn?
Why give up valuable minutes or hours on those who only ‘know’ you on the socials? Long lost overseas friends or family members interstate or abroad- YES! Guy Showalot from that course you did ten years ago, who might know someone you know, who you can’t remember, who actually annoyed you at the time and who doesn’t even own a cat to share pictures of? NOPE! (apologies to anyone called Guy Showalot, but your name is kinda funny).
Quality over quantity. SO much. EVERY time.
I’d rather a few friends who don’t think they know me because of what’s on social media. A few friends who are respectful of me, my time and my right to make God awful mistakes- and still hang around to drink champagne together (or G and T- whatever).
Ditching the socials has proven to me who really wants to share this human journey next to me, with its ups and downs and darks and lights and all the stuff in between.
Likewise, this self induced social experiment has confirmed who I want in MY life.
My gorgeous friends have their own sense of identity. They’re not trying to fit in with the supposed norm on the gram and they know there are times I need to pull away to rejuvenate and reflect.
They’ll always be there when I return to the real world and in the same way, I am honoured to be there for them. We open our souls and hearts and make space for each other. You can’t get this stuff on social media. You have to feel it. It can feel great and it can feel like crap, but we have each other’s backs and we’re in it together.
My friends are bright, brilliant souls, honest and compassionate. And I thank ALL of you for your support as I go without the perfectness and filteredness (huh?) of social media. You know who you are and I love you.
So while the family still don’t hang up their uniforms, still put dirty dishes in the sink not the dishwasher and still roll their eyes at me, we are closer, stronger and more sharing.
And my friends are my strength, my safety and my true lights….
My digital detox will continue.
If you would like to contact me I still have this thing called ’email’. And a phone (a small tablet one can talk into).
I am always happy to have a coffee face to face.
PS- I am going to try my hardest to get this blog out there but I need your help! Please share it to your friends and get them to ‘keep in touch’. I don’t spam -amongst other things. If you don’t really enjoy reading the blogs, have a great day. Thanks for making it this far!
PPS- many thanks to the girl who brought me white Lindt chocolate after my last blog! Did I mention I also like active wear? And mini Coopers? And Kitchener buns?……